what do you mean im still fat i did a sit up 3 years ago
*gets down on one knee* will u…stop talking
i love when dogs sigh. its like, hey bud, long day at the office?
LIKING SOMEONE IS SO STRESSFUL
*throws life away* *misses trashcan by like 20 feet*
a peaceful walk in the woods really relaxes me. the fact that I’m dragging a body should be irrelevant.
hello waiter can i get a milkshake, hold the boys
when she says she doesn’t send nudes
when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudes
when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia
When Russia sends you nudes